I adore you.

The last few days (last week really) has been so hard. To go from those special moments; so close in every way; to texts and the occasional phone call; I think it killed us both a little bit. But what I love about us, is that we’re okay. We always end up back in our happy glow of each other, remembering what we mean to each other, excited for the rest of our lives with each other. We’re always happy when we are together, and with only a few days separating when we next get to see each other, I think it’s easier to forget how hard it is being separated. I miss you so much; that’s what all my frustration and upset and anger boils down to. I hate texting instead of talking. I hate not seeing your face. I hate not feeling the warm of you, your soft cheeks, the way your body curves against mine. I love you and it’s hard. But I love you; and that’s all that matters in the end; I know we’ll always be okay. You are the one

So; you have personality, wit, charm, looks, talent and manners… How did I ever get someone so perfect?

I had a dream the other night that you got drunk and texted me saying you didn’t love me as much as before after what we did. And then I woke up and had a text from you that you had sent at midnight and I was so scared of what it said. Turned out you texted me half asleep (or more than half) saying that you were tired and you loved me. You’re adorable, but I guess I was still worried. I was worried you didn’t love me as much, cause I wasn’t good anymore and that’s not how you thought it would happen and you didn’t want to and you weren’t happy about it and I’m not special to you anymore. But after last night I feel better about it all, I don’t feel like you love me any less. I’m still kind of worried you are only doing it for me, not yourself. That’s not what I want. I want you to want me that much on your own, without being influenced by what I want. Sigh. I love you so much. I can’t say it made me love you more, because I already loved you as much as I am capable of; but it made my love for you so much stronger. I never thought I’d be so comfortable with anyone, yet here we are. You’re amazing. My everything. I feel so close to you, but I really wish we had at least a few more days to actually talk and cuddle before I had to leave. Next term is going to be so hard, for so many reasons; I’m already scared.

I can hardly believe you’re mine; but I am yours completely, forever. I love you more than anything, with everything, I really just cannot explain how much. You’re so special to me, and you make me feel special and I love us, together, so much. We really are perfect for each other. You’re my other half - you made me believe in such a thing. It was so easy giving my whole self to you; because you’re already this huge part of me - my heart and mind and soul - that I never want to lose. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. When I say I want all of you, I mean every aspect; like; I want you’re silly side, you’re retarded side, you’re dorky side, you’re romantic side, you’re loving side, you’re passionate side, your sexy side, you’re confident side and you’re vulnerable side; everything. I just want you <3 You’re amazing. Please, keep me forever; want me too.x

Do you realise how hard I’m finding it to keep up with your amazingness? <3

I miss you. I’m crying. I’m hurting. I’m sorry, but I can’t talk to you today. I love you.

Last night was so confusing. Such a lack of communication due to our phones (well, you’re phone pmsing and not wanting to let you get my messages, haha). I was annoyed and sad, thinking you didn’t want to talk to me when all I wanted to do was talk to you; cute to realise your texts weren’t lacking, they were in fact you being a cutesy and worrying about/missing me even though you thought I was ignoring you. Sigh, you’re the best. Thank you for finally ringing, even though you thought I wasn’t replying - even though I was, and I was dying for you to say you would go on skype. I felt instantly better talking to you, even with the dull ache of my fading headache. Ah, you’re amazing. My instant fix of ‘better’. I love you. <3

Sorry for being silly. Thank you for being so reassuring. <3

Are you over this? Please tell me a lie. Tell me the distance isn’t killing you. Tell me you think it’s worth it. Can’t you feel the same as me? Can’t you think we can do this? Please don’t get sick of me - though it seems like you already are. Please don’t give up on this. Please please please don’t leave me. I need you. I want you. I love you. Do you feel like this is drying up? I don’t. But… what are you feeling? I’m so scared of how you’re feeling.